It might be time to reevaluate your life

if you are the one who wrote 6 pages on how to hard boil an egg. This, by the way is the third google hit. I'll let you know how they turn out.

**Update: The eggs had a slight green ring but tasted great.

Zhong Biao

Copied from Luxury City

During the last (and free) day at the Denver Art Museum's Embrace! exhibition, Amanda and I stumbled upon a piece by Zhong Biao. As an informative pdf from the exhibit states, "Zhong Biao has captured the pulse of China's social reform through visual symbols familiar in contemporary Chinese culture." I don't know anything about that but what I do know is that this piece was incredible. Using sharply colored images overlaid atop grayscale-like drawings, Biao made me feel excited, angry, and that something was not quite right--and I was glad to have it pointed out. Biao is who I'd commission if I wanted a Chinese version of Dick and Jane at the Power Plant.

Other pieces that I'm afraid to post for fear of getting into copyright trouble:
1
2
3

Really amazing stuff.

Toy soldiers

(AP Photo/David Zalubowski)

Dear Josh McDaniels,

When you draft players and then cut them one year later there's a problem. This isn't fantasy.

Diagnosis

"Impingement, possible small labrum tear."(Impingement meaning pressure, encroachment, infringement.)

So after x-rays, an MRI arthrogram (large needle, dye), and several "does it hurt when I shove your shoulder this way?" sessions, that's the diagnosis.

As you'll see from the link above, impingement usually occurs at the top of the shoulder, directly underneath the clavicle at its highest point. Since high school I've had difficulty and some pain there but the sharp pain I felt 3 months ago and the subsequent weakness I've had has been in a much deeper and more central place (to find the location, put your left finger at the top of the armpit and then come straight up about 2 inches).

Dr. Eric McCarty has recommended physical therapy as a first course of action. If the pain doesn't subside or if the shoulder doesn't improve, then I can always elect to have surgery later.

For the most part, this is great news. Shoulder surgery is no small repair. Also, unlike knee injuries, shoulders often don't return fully. I'm a little disheartened because I don't know if there will be a real fix though. In my eyes, "use it less" is unacceptable.

One of the positives has been that I've begun strengthening and using my left arm for over the head motions. Although I hope to rehab my right arm, I still plan to continue throwing a football, softball, and swinging (volleyball) left handed.

Dyeing to avoid surgery?

About 2.5 months ago, I felt a very sharp pain in my shoulder when I attempted to hit (spike) a volleyball. For three weeks, I experienced deep shoulder pain when shampooing my hair, putting on a t-shirt, or making any arm motion over my head. I still cannot do pushups, throw a baseball, or pick up my laptop without immediate pain.

Tomorrow at 7:45a I go for an MRI with contrast of my shoulder. This means that specialists will inject a dye of some sort into my shoulder that should help in diagnosing any soft tissue damage. My classmate Todd described this procedure as getting stuck with a needle "fit for a horse." I am nervous for the horse needle, the damage to my wallet, and most of all, for the results.

Update

The Good: I'm enjoying management accounting, my first class this summer. Naomi Soderstrom is one of the smartest profs I've had in Business School. She is an uber nerd. Her lectures are fast paced, fun, and come with all the chocolate covered espresso beans I can eat (scary). Last night after class, I sat down with a Sublimely Self-Righteous Ale and Bartle Bull's The White Rhino Hotel, a prequel to one of my favorite books, A Cafe on the Nile. Also, Amanda and I recently went camping in Moab. This trip was hugely sucessful (more on this trip soon).

The Bad: I hate to be that guy but there's been some bad. It's not really fit for the blogosphere though.

The Ugly: Dr. Eric McCarty at the CU Sports Medicine clinic thinks I may have a torn labrum and has recommended I get an MRI. I'm no hypochondriac but after reading up on labrum tears, this sounds very much like what I feel. I'll keep you posted.

Is Your Mother a Prostitute?

No this isn't the latest Cosmo test. It was actually a question posed to potential NFL first round draft pick Dez Bryant by the Miami Dolphins General Manager Jeff Ireland in a pre-draft interview. After Bryant reported the question, public outcry reached incredibly high levels. Ireland has since apologized to Bryant but his query still may end up costing him his job. Question is, was Ireland in the wrong to ask this admittedly very insensitive question?

From Ireland's perspective:
Now this is obviously an insulting question and probably was even intended to be so. General Managers are under intense pressure to draft young men who will perform well on and off the field. This potential draft pick has a history of off-field issues. The NFL punishes players and teams for morality issues even if no criminal charges get filed. Ireland must be able to accurately assess the risk that Bryant is going to get in trouble down the road. As the Dolphins enter a window of playoff contention they can't afford to squander their first round pick. It's important to know how Bryant responds to adversity and unpleasant situations. Also, for the record there's a pretty good chance she is a prostitute.

Let's get one thing clear. This is not your standard job interview. This is the NFL draft, wherein players submit to all sorts of physical and psychological pokes, prods, tests, and measurements. Why? Because the 32 people drafted in the first round this year will be given somewhere between $6 Million and $42 Million guaranteed. Standard job interview rules don't apply.

From Bryant's perspective:
Bryant is in an impossible situation here. If he calmly fields this incredibly offensive question he may be labeled as soft, or a pansy--a kiss of death in the human meat-grinder of an industry that is the NFL. If he tells this @$$hat where to shove it he may fall out the first round for "having issues", thereby losing his big payday and his ability to immediately get his mom (prostitute or not) off the streets where she was selling cocaine last year to survive.

Furthermore, this question is simply irrelevant to determining Bryant's potential. He, like many football players came from a very difficult background but whether or not Bryant's mom is a prostitute has no baring on his ability to play football.

Finally, would a white draft prospect be asked this question? Would a middle-aged white man from Texas who holds all the power in this dynamic dare ask a white student this? Unlikely. Must Bryant, who will almost certainly endure numerous injuries and ultimately shorten his life expectancy be expected to break himself for a racist jerk like this?

From my perspective:
Ireland shouldn't have asked the question. Period. It's offensive and really, is this going to help him make a decision? Ireland works for one of the few NFL teams who have (minority) owners of color. Furthermore, the league is clearly trying to expand viewership in non-white markets. Questions like this set the Dolphins and the league back. It's just not worth it. Also, if Ireland really needs to know the answer, couldn't he just ask Bryant to expand on his childhood?

With its measuring, testing, and guesswork regarding the likely productivity individual humans, 65% of whom are black, the NFL draft bears an uncomfortable resemblence to slave auctions. Teams all but ask players to show them how nice their teeth are. Is there a more dehumanizing interview process in America? (Check Chris Rock for a very NSFW piece on the NFL)

The difference is, electing to play football at the highest level is a legitimate choice. No one is forcing Bryant or any of the other thousands of players who declare themselves draft-eligible to do this. While Ireland's question is insensitive, unnecessary, and probably racist, he should have the right to ask whatever he wants. This isn't a Kumbayya session, it's football. His job rests on him being able to assess talent and risk.



Personally, if you are interviewing me for that kind of cash you can ask ask, intimate, or outright accuse me, my family, or anyone else. I may not like it and I'll never respect you as a person but it'll be worth it in the end. No one will make YouTube highlight reels about Jeff Ireland. They've already made 800 about Bryant.

Thoughts?

Fruit

 photo from AndysOrchard.com

One of my favorite parts of summer is the abundance of fresh fruit. Every year I eagerly await the coming of Costco's 2lb box of Ranier Cherries. Yellow cherries are no gimmick friends. They tend to be 130% to 200% of the cost of red cherries but when you bite down through a really sweet meaty cherry, you'll know where that money went. I have put down the entire 2lbs box in one setting. This is not recommended.

Currently King Soopers (dumbest name for a grocery store ever) is selling whole pineapples for $3 (Sooper Card required). I don't want to know what insidious deals one has to strike with other countries in order to get $3 pineapples but damn these things are good.

Know before you go: http://www.wikihow.com/Tell-if-a-Pineapple-Is-Ripe

Quick Update in No Particular Order

School: One year and one final to go. I can't wait to rediscover happy hours when I graduate. Interestingly, because of programatic budget changes at the Leeds School of Business, I have the option to graduate one semester early. However, the program cost doesn't change. I learned in business school that it's unwise to pay $5,500 for air. I'll be getting final two class's worth, thanks.

Love: Amanda and I got back together in March and celebrated our one year anniversary in April. I planned to write a long epic post detailing how we got back together but it would have necessitated chronicling most of the last year, something that is hard to do. Since we reunited things have been great. We have already made summer plans for Rockies games, concerts galore, and camping. 

Work: I never really blog about work but I will say that 2010 is going better than 2009, which went better than 2008. One of the projects I'm working on is helping Paul write a poker book. 

Fitness: A nagging shoulder injury has sidelined me for the week. Currently I'm having trouble lifting this laptop. In the meantime I've been running a fair amount, albeit sporadically. 

Other: As I'm sure you noticed from the previous picture, I have a big bushy beard!  Also, blogger decided to get with the 21st Century and update itself. Now we have strikethrough. 

A Happy Birthday

Today I turn 29 years old, an age The Big Bopper, Kitty Genovese, and Heath Ledger failed to reach. My birthday began last night with a party at Jump Street in Thornton, where friends and family assembled for intense battles of trampoline dodgeball (pictures coming soon!). I had a wonderful time and have the ~black eye to prove it. Amanda baked delicious cherry almond cupcakes.

After dodgeball we went to the Castaways Lounge, a dive bar that appears to have been inspired in equal parts by Jimmy Buffet and Dale Earnhardt Jr. This nautical theme is consistent with Westminster's dolphin fountain so I felt right at home.

I have received awesome presents this year: tasty looking wine, a sweet backpacking thermos for cold climbs, a very fancy kite, deluxe Eddie Bauer ladder golf, and best of all... tickets to Green Day in August!

The best part of my birthday has been spending time with my friends and family. Thank you thank you.

Caucus?

My mom is desperately trying to get me to attend the democratic caucus on Tuesday night. I find politics so depressing that in the past, I have just buried my head in the sands of ignorance and let others make the decisions affecting virtually every aspect of my civic life. I realize that logically I either must not care what happens or should fight to change it. It's just hard to feel that I'll be making a difference. Nevertheless, I guess I'll go and see what this "politics" thing is all about. :)

Breakupdate

Since Amanda and I broke up, I've been eating better, and running a lot. I know that these are completely predictable and perfectly cliche but they feel good. Instead of getting a haircut, AKA the most cliche move of all time, I've begun growing a beard.

I've also been playing online poker.

Instead of trying to consciously choose how to feel, I've just been doing whatever feels right. Sometimes this involves listening to sad music, sometimes it involves midnight trips to King Soopers for broccoli. Mostly I've been spending more time with various friends.

I also signed up for a library card and have been devouring mountaineering books. These books really fall into two categories: 

1. I survived a disaster and here are pictures (e.g. Into Thin Air, Annapurna, In the Hall of the Mountain King)
2. I can't explain why I climb but I will try (Mixed Emotions, Above the Clouds, In the Shadow of Denali, Climb)

The best books combine the two. Walker has declared that he will climb Longs Peak this summer. I definitely plan to accompany him. My goal is to use the Bolder Boulder and possibly the Garden of the Gods half marathon as tune ups for 14er season.

I went dancing at the Mercury Cafe last Tuesday and had a wonderful time. If felt as if it my soul had let its hair down. I have at times described the swing scene as petty (and I even helped cause it to be so) but since the 23 Skidoo implosion of 2008, the scene has become more friendly and more supportive. Dancing on Tuesday, enveloped by great music (somewhat of a Merc rarity these days), I felt a wonderful combination of nostalgic, comforted, and Sasha Fierce.

The chief beneficiary of the breakup has been Roxy the cat. She never suffered for lack of affection but now I'm home every night and it's pretty easy to read with one hand and give Roxy love with the other. She has reclaimed her spot at the top of the bed. 

As for dating, I know I'm not ready but online profiles are siren songs. I set up a minimal profile and have been lurking. Even down the road, I don't know if I'll muster the energy to meet random people and hope for sparks. Perhaps in a few months...

Life is good. I am about to turn 29. I miss blogging but have struggled with how much to share.